It's bad enough that Amazon's latest product is basically a way to monitor your face (in the dark!) and record everything you're even thinking about buying. Atop all that, CEO Jeff Bezos sounds like a movie villain when ordering breakfast.

The following comes from D Magazine, which just published a terrific profile of Matt Rutledge, whose company was purchased by Amazon:

He looked down at his plate. Bezos had ordered a dish called Tom's Big Breakfast, a preparation of Mediterranean octopus that includes potatoes, bacon, green garlic yogurt, and a poached egg. "You're the octopus that I'm having for breakfast," Rutledge remembers Bezos saying. "When I look at the menu, you're the thing I don't understand, the thing I've never had. I must have the breakfast octopus."

Not until Rutledge had returned to Dallas and related the story to his anxious employees—now Amazon's employees—did he realize just how absurd that explanation sounded. Before it can be eaten, generally, the breakfast octopus must be killed.

Emphasis added. Holy fuck! This guy will probably end up controlling the entire publishing industry and possibly the entirety of retail. Who's hungry?

h/t Paul Ford

Photo: Getty