Every show about a brainiac is in want of a eureka moment. On last night's season finale of Silicon Valley, the lightbulb turned on thanks to an elaborate riff on manually pleasuring the mostly male audience at TechCrunch Disrupt—all in order to win the conference's startup competition.

In case you thought the age of corporate paranoia had passed at Apple, well, it has not.

What do you get when you cross a lightly-used copy of Atlas Shrugged and a hackathon? Lincoln Labs, a Bay Area group determined to "iterate our way to success" and "advance liberty in the public square with the use of technology."

Google hired masseur Elvis Gardin to support one of the cushiest, perk-filled workplaces in the world. But according to a new lawsuit, the company's New York office took the perk too far: Gardin says a client pleasured himself mid-rub, and got axed when he complained about it.

Privacy, there's a form for that. Google reluctantly complied with the European Union's "Right To Be Forgotten" ruling, which lets citizens petition search engines to takedown* a URL. *The site will only be stripped in the EU and Google will disclose when a listing was cut.

It's been a few weeks since we've heard from RadiumOne CEO Gurbaksh Chahal, but there's no rest for the abusive. Chahal has upgraded from writing demented blog posts to writing delusional letters to CNNMoney. "What did I do to deserve this," the CEO charged with 45 felony counts implores.

Private universities are no different from Hollywood. There's an "it" girl and her name is Stanford. Harvard will now be auditioning for roles as the hot mom.

Uber, the thunderous on-demand chauffeur startup, released two big pieces of news today. First, it boasted that it's creating a bevy of high-paying jobs. Then, Uber's CEO praised the arrival of driverless cars. You can't be a job creator and a job destroyer.

For the first time ever Google, "organizer of the world's information," has released pertinent information about itself. Only 2 percent of Google employees are black and only 30 percent are women. No wonder the corporation, consistently voted the one of the best places you can work, has "always been reluctant to publish numbers" showing who has been locked out.

Evan Spiegel, the boyish cofounder and CEO of Snapchat, is dying to be taken seriously. He rejected Mark Zuckerberg, opines like Steve Jobs, and hobnobs with media titans. But Spiegel's undergrad emails—when he began his path to Snapchat—show a different Evan. Did Steve Jobs ever joke about peeing on girls?

San Francisco's housing market is now more exuberant than the dotcom boom, leaving eviction notices for longtime tenants and all cash buyers in a bidding frenzy. Even renting a couch in some dude's living room now comes with a sweat equity clause.

So much has changed since the Arab Spring. Wael Ghonim, the Google marketing executive credited with igniting a revolution in Egypt, just joined Google's venture capital firm as an entrepreneur-in-residence because "He's really trying to move his life forward."

How does Sheryl Sandberg's brand of corporate feminism apply to working women who haven't been offered "a seat on a rocketship"? We'll find out tomorrow when she delivers the commencement speech at Harvard. Female employees at a local hotel (housed in building owned by Harvard) plan on using Sandberg's talk as an opportunity to ask the Facebook COO to back their efforts to unionize.

Data proves that getting a college degree is worth it. Let's see what Silicon Valley data fiends have to say about this empirical evidence via The New York Times

Search engines and home security go together about as well as microwave ovens and television programming, but now that Facebook is a utility, Google might as well be GE. The Information reports that Google's Nest division wants to expand beyond smart-thermostats by acquiring Dropcam, the company famous for "[taking] the nanny cam out of the fake teddy bear."

Twitter's new growth strategy is Facebook's old one: developing countries. eMarketer says Twitter will grow fastest this year in Indonesia, India, Argentina, Mexico, and Brazil. Good thing since eMarketer also said Twitter's internal monthly active user count was off by 60 million.

Rap Genius cofounder Mahbod Moghadam resigned from both the company and its board of directors, effective immediately, after leaving inappropriate annotations on the manifesto by Elliot Rodgers, the alleged Santa Barbara shooter.

A woman wearing Google Glass was recently asked to remove the computer—infamous for publicized recordings taken by its entitled owners—before having brunch at a popular East Village restaurant called Feast. In retaliation, the diner and her 3,000 plus Google+ followers have extracted a search engine optimized pound of flesh.