Just last year at about this time, venture capitalist Chris Dixon predicted in Wired that the price of bitcoin could "easily" go as high as $100,000. Those were heady times!

Rap Genius co-founder Mahbod Moghadam is a testament to just how far you can push a venture capitalist. The Yale graduate is one of tech's foremost delusional fools—repeatedly embarrassing himself, his company, and everyone connected with it. He eventually resigned from the startup after publicly praising parts of a serial killer's manifesto. Yet it took a post about thieving from Whole Foods for one of his investors to finally disown him.

Scratch "software is eating the world." From the mouth of babes, Andreessen Horowitz partner Benedict Evans pulled a new pronouncement: "mobile is eating the world" while "technology" eats all our time and attention.

Recode tried to warn you over and over that Silicon Valley found love in a hopeless place (Florida). Now it's official. Google announced that it led a $542 million round in Magic Leap, an augmented reality startup run by wackadoo supreme Rony Abovitz.

If female celebrities break into a cold sweat over Reddit users, just image how investors feel after throwing down $50 million in the hopes of profiting off the crowd-sourced site. But lead investor Sam Altman and CEO Yishan Wong appear to have come up with a plan to appease "the often volatile Reddit community."

Divine, an underground rapper from Brooklyn, has taken his friendship with venture capitalist Ben Horowitz, who invested in Rap Genius, to the next level. First Divine made a music video for Horowitz's birthday. Now they're posing in matching tees that says: VC LIFE: Inspired by Ben Horowitz.

This weekend, the CEO of Reddit tried to defend r/TheFappening, a section of his website trafficking in illegally obtained nude photos of young female celebrities. His argument? "Every man is responsible for his own soul." Not long after, Reddit backtracked and shut the page down anyways. Perhaps it was out of concern for Reddit's upcoming A-list Silicon Valley investors?

Last night Andreessen Horowitz, the same venture capital firm that invested in Facebook and Twitter, announced a $50 million investment in BuzzFeed that presumes the value of the company to be $850 million. General partner Chris Dixon compared BuzzFeed to Tesla, Uber, and Netflix because of its deep emphasis on technology and "world-class systems for analytics, advertising, and content management."

It's no longer enough for venture capitalists to give a startup millions of dollars without any promise of return. Now, the New York Times says, app creators must also be "coddled as royalty" by their middle-aged benefactors.

Cleveland Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert must have the hot hand. The Comic Sans-loving billionaire just won the dramatic toss up for LeBron James. Gilbert also boxed out other investors for a spot in a new round of funding for Rap Genius that is worth $40 million. Backing braggarts, it seems, is now an investment philosophy.

Remember Tentwenty, the anonymous local app rife with tech gossip (in the Bay Area)? One of its users was right about Andreessen Horowitz leading an inside round in Zenefits, even calling the $500 million valuation. So, when can we expect that Square credit card?

Investor Marc Andreessen also dabbles in psychoanalysis. "The nature of the public market is that it is manic depressive," he told the New York Times. "It gets excited, it gets depressed." A couple impending M&As put tech stocks in a good mood today, but we'll see how long that lasts

Last week I downloaded Tentwenty, a newly launched local message board that displays text and photos from anonymous users according to where they are in real time. Scrolling through my sparse feed at home in Brooklyn, I noticed that initial users weren't from the expected tech set, as well as a puzzling number of posts from Tenafly, New Jersey (not traditionally considered an early adopter mecca).

Worrying about the ethics of venture capitalists is a lot like testing the acoustics of outer space. But you'd think the moneyed white men of Silicon Valley would act with a little class when they get turned down—it's just business, right? Not this time.

The latest stop on Marc Andreessen's can't stop, won't stop loquacious world tour is this obsessive-compulsive evisceration of Carl Icahn (The third in a series.) With bloggers like this, the news business is going to be a-okay.

There are only three decent Twitter parody accounts in tech. There's the late, great @fakedorsey, which deleted its imaginary dispatches from the mind of Jack Dorsey. Then there's @ViceMeme, although that's more oh fuck this is life now than funny haha. And, before it got suspended, @A16ZElevator showed real promise.

Twitter wasn't always Marc Andreessen's jam. His recent bout of 140 character logorrhea came after a lengthy 983 day silent period. But the venture capitalist is back with a vengeance and recently launched a diatribe dismissing people who question the NSA as naive and possibly illiterate.

In a new Q&A with the Wall Street Journal, Marc Andreessen argues that skeptics who predict the second coming of the dotcom bubble "just don't know what they're talking about." This time around, he says, it's all about building a franchise, baby.

Balaji Srinivasan, Stanford lecturer and newest addition to the Andreessen Horowitz venture capital all-star team, does not want to live near you. He believes he and his Silicon Valley vanguard deserve their own place—literally, a separate society. Now, the crazy is crazier: meet the "Inverse Amish."