Twitter has been struggling to define its vision for some time now. To help assure investors they're getting their shit together, the company unveiled a new strategy statement today. And like the company itself, it's a complete mess.

Google has been going on a real estate shopping spree over the past few years, signaling the company is preparing to hire thousands. According to the Bay Area News Group, the search giant's development plans would allow Google to hire as many as 30,000 new employees in the coming years.

Handy, the on-demand "handyman" and house cleaning startup, is facing a class action lawsuit for violating an impressive amount of labor laws. The suit alleges that the company refuses workers minimum wages, paid breaks, overtime pay, and withholds tips, amongst other violations. Workers also claim the startup, which has raised $45.7 million in funding, imposes onerous demands on workers, including instructing them on "how to use the bathroom."

These are the important questions and only one investor is brave enough to ask.

Point Reyes is one of Northern California's premier natural treasures, and Pandora's Tim Westergren wants a piece. The 48-year-old co-founder wants to retire on the peninsula. But his new neighbors aren't thrilled with his plans to clear a plot of forest to construct a mansion.

Messing with a competitor's ability to get funding is not a good look for Uber, says the venture capitalist who invested in the e-hailing app Hailo. The venture capitalist behind Lyft totally agrees!

As the wealth gap continues to grow across America, many are wondering if technological advances will just make the lives of workers worse. But two Silicon Valley billionaires say not to worry—technology isn't the problem. In fact, they think innovators are the ones being left behind.

Beautiful human and fragrance retailer Keira Knightly sat on Jimmy Kimmel's couch last night and discussed a private Silicon Valley screening of her new movie, The Imitation Game, hosted by American billionaire Mark Zuckerberg, American millionaire Harvey Weinstein, and Russian billionaire Yuri Milner, a well-known tech investor.

By Silicon Valley standards, Munchery is already a success. The startup, which hand-delivers cold meals for customers to reheat, has tens of millions in funding. One of its investors likes to call it "the largest restaurant in the world." To get to that level, however, Munchery has been illegally storing Silicon Valley's dinner on the street.

San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee announced Thursday that he's running for re-election. Four days later, his campaign already hit its first setback. Sen. Dianne Feinstein told the Chronicle that she's not ready to endorse him for a second term, citing concerns with local Airbnb laws. Maybe she's looking at the alternatives?

Years ago, pundits wondered if Zynga would become the Google of games. Now it's starting to look more like Pets.com: the Wall Street Journal reports that the Zynga's quarterly losses are up nearly 84,000 percent from last year.

David Shing has the kind of gig that can only exist mid-bubble, when dinosaur corporations chase Snapchat into extinction. He pulls down six figures as AOL's "Digital Prophet." He hallucinates about the future and executives receive his wisdom like hair spikes are a barometer for intelligence. These are the kind of prophecies you get from a coddled cartoon character.

Uber is reportedly raising another billion in cash, which could make the company "worth" $25 billion. This comes just five months after Uber raised $1.2 billion at a $17 billion valuation. Why does it need more money so soon? Re/code says "it's unclear."

The legal battle between Lyft and its former COO is shaping up to be a long, ugly fight. The on-demand car company has accused Travis VanderZanden of stealing tens of thousands of secret company documents before he joined Lyft's main competitor, Uber. Now VanderZanden has fired back in a new court filing, saying he was plotting with Lyft's board of directors to dispose of the company's CEO before leaving the startup.

Mark Zuckerberg is already paying dozens of kids to hold parking spots overnight outside the construction site for his San Francisco mansion. But he's now taken street occupation a step further: Capp Street Crap tweets that this is a "photo of one of the cranes that shut down [21st Street] to hoist fully mature trees into Zuckerberg's yard."

Twitter has endured an exodus of executives and managers from the company's ranks following its IPO. And those departures have become such a problem, the Wall Street Journal reports, the company is turning resigning leaders into corporate ghosts.

Google caused a sea-crazed frenzy when the press discovered mystery barges floating off both US coasts. But the company dismantled the giant showrooms before their public unveiling over pesky public safety regulations: Google had no good answer when authorities asked if their retail barges were floating fire hazards.

Aereo, the once-promising startup that wanted to bring live TV to your laptop, is laying off "most of its staff." The company raised $97 million in financing to fight broadcasters like Fox, NBC, and Disney by exploiting a loophole in copyright law, but lost in the Supreme Court.

Looks like the FBI had a good time checking out a Tesla purchased with drug bitcoin. According to the Blake Benthall's neighbor, "about 20" feds searched the startup sports car over the accused's involvement in Silk Road 2.0. #mystery, solved.

Uber made a small splash last month when it hired Lyft's former COO Travis VanderZanden. Kara Swisher said the move "will surely increase tensions between Uber and Lyft, which are now pretty tense as it is." And she was right: Lyft is suing VanderZanden, alleging that he took company secrets along with him to Uber.