Twitter's New "Strategy Statement" is a Trash Heap of Jargon
Twitter has been struggling to define its vision for some time now. To help assure investors they're getting their shit together, the company unveiled a new strategy statement today. And like the company itself, it's a complete mess.
As the Wall Street Journal's Dennis K. Berman points out, the single sentence strategy statement has "35 words, 62 syllables, 4 clauses, [and] 2 grammatical errors." It also drops in the word "world" three times, as if twice wasn't enough.
According to the Journal, Twitter's CFO Anthony Noto admitted he can't really read the sprawling nonsense:
Noto also read out Twitter's new mission statement, which he admitted was a mouthful: "Reach the largest daily audience in the world by connecting everyone to their world via our information sharing and distribution platform products and be one of the top revenue generating Internet companies in the world."
"I struggle to read it every time," Noto said.
Here's the best proofreading tip in the world: if you can't read your gobbledygook out loud, give it another pass.
Correction: Multiple outlets and one investment analyst reported that Twitter unveiled a new mission statement today. However, a company spokesperson tells Valleywag that the company actually updated its strategy statement. The post has been updated to reflect that.
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