Sarah Slocum, a San Francisco resident, social nightmare, and self-professed cyborg hate crime victim, is also a liar. Watch her on local TV, describing the bar she recorded with her face computer, as she denies recording with her face computer.

There was a valet stationed outside The Battery on Sunday night. Even for a private clubhouse with a $2,400 annual fee, this seemed superfluous. San Francisco's Financial District turns into a ghost town after 6 p.m. The neighborhood was so desolate, the only place I could find to charge my phone was a SUBWAY® around the corner, where they gave me free rein over an outlet behind the soda fountain.

There are bad people in every town, but New York has long managed to stay at the top of the prick-heap, despite steep competition from L.A and Portland. But the latest issue of New York mag raises the possibility of a Silicon Valley usurper.

The Silicon Valley creation myth is now Diet Coke advertising fodder. [via Paolo Sambrano]

The "Shame" list on this Clarion Alley mural includes Uber, Lyft, Airbnb, Corporate Tax Give-Aways from Mayor Ed Lee and the SF Eviction Epidemic. And this was painted before a house in Glen Park could fetch $530,000 above asking price in two weeks.

While so many scramble to find/keep housing, the idea of moving to San Francisco made Tim Bray, a well-known developer advocate for Google, give notice. "I find the Bay Area congested, racist, incestuous, and overpriced." Bray promised to keep Google's secrets, so don't expect brutal honesty about his soon-to-be-former employer.

Rejoice, Silicon Valley, tech blogs have solved all your infrastructure issues. You can either (1) colonize Oakland or (2) act more like Connecticut. What sounds better: crust punk or cable knit?

Nothing that starts with "The liberal wonderland of the San Francisco Bay Area..." will end well. But this meditation on tech money and the middle class quickly moves from head-scratching ("Home Ownership As Housesitting For Rich People Not Yet Moved In") to hair-pulling ("Do We Need Affordable Housing Units?").

The fabulous, 7th annual Crunchies—Silicon Valley's Teen Choice Awards—will kick off this coming Monday. As startup luminaries and the press converge on the Davies Symphony Hall in San Francisco, a group of angry protesters will be waiting for them.

Ed Lee is the mayor of San Francisco by the grace of that city's deep-pocketed technologists. He continues to return the favor in both deeds and rhetoric: a new interview with Time has Lee explaining that his city's middle class isn't like yours:

Google isn't just a scapegoat. Data-centric journalist Chris Walker plotted an array of data against a map of San Francisco's Google Bus stops, and shows just how these shuttles can help change a neighborhood.

Google's private shuttle system, which whisks staffers away from the cruel streets of San Francisco to the sterile safety of Mountain View, already has a big image problem. What could make it even more dystopian? How about a memo from the overlords with eerie talking points?

Artists, Bay Area residents, and Valleywag readers Colleen Flaherty and Matteo Bittanti shared their latest joint work with us—a series titled "The Streetviews of San Francisco." Or, more plainly, The Bus Wars. It's urban resentment you can fit on a shelf.

Never, ever forget: the Silicon Valley insider crowd is exempt from the rules and norms of the rest of the citizenry. TechCrunch excitedly reports on a new app called "Fixed," which will help San Franciscans automatically kill parking tickets, whether or not they deserve it.

There's now a layer of corporate muscle standing between window-smashers and Google's soft, fleshy staffers: Reuters reports San Francisco's highly controversial campus shuttles are now being guarded.

There aren't enough ways for the Bay Area software crowd to insulate itself from people with regular jobs: and so, The Battery exists. But what's going on behind the $2,400 doors of the startup clubhouse? The New York Times took a look, and it's just so, so boring.

An eye-opening look into the world of tech public communications: a reporter at Mission Local wanted to know what Google thought about being more hated than ever these days. Its (inadvertent) reply says it all.

There's been a lot of talk about easing tensions in San Francisco of late. Ron Conway wants to squash it, Mayor Ed Lee begged it hush up. Now Google is giving it a shot . . . in the most socially awkward way possible: a private employees-only ferry named The Triumphant.

The only thing more laughable than protestors demanding that tech corporations pay San Francisco $1 billion/year for illegally using public bus stops is Mayor Ed Lee's proposed solution. His plan calls for companies like Google to pay a pitiful $1 per bus stop squat.