Simple, the banking startup, raised $15 million in venture capital by promising "no worries" and "no fees." Thousands of customers hung around on a waiting list for years to sign up for CEO Josh Reich's crusade against our fragmented banking system, a decision some recently regretted.

Computer executive Steve Jobs reportedly passed away in 2011 after a long battle with cancer and Google's Android operating system. How, then, did this trustworthy guy from Reddit just take a selfie with Steve Jobs?

Before Warby Parker came around, you had to build your own glasses until your hands bled—remember that? Now, buying corrective lenses is fun and (relatively) cheap, and Warby sells the startup chic de rigueur. So chic, it appears, they can get away with paying crappy salaries.

Republicans have long struggled to capture the hearts of millennials. It's never helped that the emerging crop of young voters are fundamentally opposed to the GOP's archaic social policies and general inclination toward stupidity. But the party of Big Business thinks it has found a wedge issue in Silicon Valley that can seduce skeptical kids: backing anti-regulation startups like Uber.

Venture capital firms have been sniffing around Tinder, the Los Angeles-based dating app, since at least last spring. But according to one Valleywag source, Benchmark's Matt Cohler may soon sign one of Silicon Valley's most coveted term sheets. (On Sand Hill Road, it seems, fast growth is forever, while sexual harassment and discrimination suits can disappear.)

In her 2012 book The Boy Kings, early Facebooker Kate Losse describes the tribulations of being a woman at a company that didn't get women. A new eBook by another early Facebook alum details just how uncomfortable it was.

LinkedIn has been busted by the Department of Labor for failing to pay hundreds of employees their owed overtime wages. When investigators informed the company of their findings, the omnipresent résumé site and noted spam factory conceded to paying wronged employees nearly $6 million in back wages and damages.

Youths are our greatest national resource, and the youth of today are making apps for effortless on-demand junk food delivery. I talked to one, 19-year-old Max Hellerstein, who captured today's tech headlines with his new startup, Push For Pizza.

Justin.tv shutting down before Google reportedly buys Twitch for $1 billion is a prime example of the unspoken brutality of acquisitions: "Purchases are often followed by consolidation, as well as cutting off any excess limbs."

San Francisco is just five days into its tech bus pilot program and one of Silicon Valley's glistening chariots has already lodged itself at the bottom of one of the city's hills. Fortunately for the bus operator, San Francisco's public transportation agency is en route to free it:

San Francisco's politicians have been working hard to make nice with Airbnb. They even let Airbnb's lobbyists make the city's "home sharing" regulations more liberal, allowing homeowners to host with Airbnb without obtaining an expensive bed and breakfast permit. But now that the proposed rules have been amended by the city's Planning Department, the company is staging protests against them.

One of forces responsible for getting reluctant tech corporations to release their diversity data was Pinterest engineer Tracy Chou, who started collecting the numbers herself. Chou will be featured in an upcoming documentary "CODE: Debugging the Gender Gap."

In past six weeks former Facebook mafioso Dave Morin has changed his Twitter bio at least three times. Three versions of his mini memoir—"Small town guy," "Small town guy from Montana," and "Entrepreneur & Investor"—omitted any mention of Path, the struggling social networking startup that has raised $77 million in funding.

It's fine for a startup with $30 million in venture capital to not actually have a product—but what if it doesn't have an office, either? A tipster tells us Clinkle, the software disaster that keeps on disaster-ing, just fled its SF headquarters.

How does becoming a billionaire feel? For Mark Cuban, it was nothing short of primordial bliss.

If the guiding principle for building great startups is "solve an important problem," then the difficulty tech workers have locating (and laundering!) garments to wear in public would appear to be the sartorial equivalent of Fermat's last theorem.

After making a bloody mess of Mt. Gox, the first and biggest name in Bitcoin trading, no one is expecting CEO Mark Karpeles to redeem himself and refund their missing cyber-money. A new report of Karpeles' criminal past won't help.

San Francisco's big push to make tech corporations pay for years of clogging city bus stops ended with a shrug. Starting today, the 18-month pilot program will charge a mere $3.55 per-stop fee for shuttle operators. But organizations figured out a way to avoid even that small token of goodwill just by crossing the street.

eBay just released its "diversity" report, following Yahoo, Twitter, Google, and Facebook. The numbers are not good, but not as homogenous as the competition: 42 percent of the company is female, and a whopping seven percent is black. Compared to Facebook, eBay is the cast of Glee.

If you had your heart set on buying a $1,500 face computer inside a giant barge, your life is fucked: Google looks like it's phasing out the plan for grand, floating Android showrooms, a dystopian-commerce future we couldn't handle and didn't deserve.